Wednesday, March 23, 2016

E X P E R I E N C E S

           Experiences are said to shape who you are. Past and present experiences have shaped your current being, and future experiences aim to mold you into someone potentially different, although people generally don’t want to admit that they change; and what you’d consider an experience and what I’d consider an experience may end up being completely different things. Up until January of this year, I was trying to edit out certain experiences that I’ve had, and I was also focusing way too much on which experiences I would need to have to meet my large expectations for my future that I had (and still have) all planned out.
However, it hasn’t been until recently that I’ve realized how absolutely stupid I have been. I know that goals are essential to success, and I definitely do not disagree, but for myself personally I’ve focused on those goals a little too much. I ended up being so enthralled with the whole idea of this future I could have, that I completely forgot to live in the now. I could probably count on one (maybe two) hand(s) the number of memorable experiences I had in the last few months of 2015; and that isn’t really something to be proud of. I forgot to involve myself in experiences that could potentially help me shape my own future in the way I wanted. My mindset before leaving the US was in fact one that I am certainly not proud of, one of “next month everything will be better” or “my life will finally be perfect once I am in the UK” because I didn’t know what I wanted. I just knew I wanted something different than what I had at the moment. That being said, not knowing what you want is NOT very motivating at all, and that lead me sitting around thinking something would just all of a sudden happen to me, and everything would be great again. NO STUPID, that’s not the case, if you want to make yourself better, you’ve got to get out there and do something.
You’ve got to go to the experiences, they will not come to you.

This is something super valuable that I’ve learned since I have been here. You’ve got to get out, network, and meet people. Go out with friends, and never shy away from anyone introducing you to someone else. Everything you do is an experience, it’s a memory that your future will draw upon. While I do still have a very specific plan of what I’d like my future to look like, I have also come to terms with the fact that you cannot control what is going to happen to you. While I am not completely comfortable to give up the reigns and say “whatever happens, happens”, I am at least aware that this is actually the case because no matter how much preparation you do, things you never anticipate happen all the time.
Since living here in the UK I have really improved my motivation to gain experiences that will benefit me in any way possible, even if I cannot see how they could immediately affect me. I’ve seriously attended more events, seminars and conferences in these past few months than I have like, ever in my entire life. I’ve met people and gone out with people, and now feel absolutely no fear to get out and see what someone has to offer to me… this is a big step for someone boring, who rarely left their house by themselves just 3 months ago and arguably was terrified to socialize. That being said I’ve had incredible experiences so far in 2016, and I am feeling as motivated as ever to improve myself, to take chances, and gain experiences. Experiences make you exciting, and I want to be exciting. I want to be the person with exciting stories, and right now I’m just in the process of building up my portfolio.
To end, I’ll leave you with this- the most valuable advice I got before embarking on my journey this year was “If it looks like it will make a great story… do it.” This is something I’ve taken for granted for way too long. I’m ready, not so much for a “fresh” start, but more of a jump start in a general direction (because I didn’t really have one before now to be honest) of what I think at the moment I’d like to happen, with the understanding that it may change, but that doesn’t really matter so much.

Thanks for reading this one, I know it wasn’t the funniest, or the most exciting. It wasn’t exactly the easiest for me to explain in writing precisely what I wanted to say – also my apologies to Mom if this made you tear up a bit.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Cheers! xoxo

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